A Tribute to the Desperate Bridesmaids... (who were not really desperate at all)-Day 5

Friendship is a funny thing.  The ebbs and flows of friendship are like waves in an ocean.

Sometimes really close, sometimes really far-on a multitude of levels.

I've been lucky in my life. I've been blessed by so many incredible friends. And not just the ones below. Even since my wedding, God has blessed me with many more amazing women who touch my life daily. 

I learned from the master. 

Yes, another life lesson from my mom. 

My mom had so many friends. At her memorial service, 5 different people got up and spoke and stated how she was their BEST friend. And she made them all feel special. A monthly fight between my parents growing up was the phone bill. My mom loved to talk and talk and talk. She always told me that you can not put a price on friendship. And so I learned from the best that you must work to maintain friendships. You have to make the effort. And sometimes it's hard. 

Sometimes it's almost more drama than it's worth. But then there are those moments, when friendship is pure perfection and you know that's it's forever. No matter the drama...no matter the effort that it takes to stay in touch, no matter the hurt feelings, or the how busy your life becomes. I once read a quote that said, "You don't have to change friends as long as you understand that friends change!" 

While I'm not perfect at this- I certainly try to always keep it in mind.

Sometimes I fail miserably as a friend. My follow-up lately has been pitiful (At best). However, that is the beauty of true friends. It all comes back around in the end. Everyone has their crazy season's and times when they feel disconnected. Yet, I am a firm believer that each of these women were put in my life for a reason, and I am just so glad that they accept me-over and over again. 

Man, I'm lucky! 

When it came time to choose my bridesmaids, I struggled. I had so many good friends from so many different periods in my life. Dan and I had a long discussion about this and finally (in his very non-traditional way), he said, "Just have them all in the wedding!" 

ALL 13 of them...

Yes, you heard me right.

 13. 

I know it's ridiculous. I get the looks all the time when people ask about our wedding. 

13. 

But I'm serious when I say that I could not have done it any differently. 

We compromised by having all 13 walk down the aisle, but actually sit during the ceremony. And I let them choose their own dresses (in several shades of blue). Other than that, they were true bridesmaids in every sense of the word. 

And what I mean is that they loved me, they supported me, they were there every second of that 6 months leading up to and during that incredible weekend. They laughed with me. They cried with me. And I know, that in a second, any one of them would still be there now.  A year after my wedding, over half of them made the trip to Texas for my mom's memorial service.  

Though our lives get crazy and we are all doing different things now, I still feel them around me all the time. There is just something about a girlfriend that knows you well. Time and distance don't matter. 

So here's to you girls. I love you. 

This is the house that I stayed in with my bridesmaids. We had so much fun in here. Lots of fun drama (that will not be repeated on this blog). The name of the house was "Almost Heaven." It was fabulous. I loved having most all of them under one roof. It was so much fun to watch my junior high/college friends bond with my Charlotte friends. We actually all stayed in touch through a group email for a good year after my wedding. (We need to start that up again girls). 

A picture of all my ladies on my wedding day. 

The following pictures are of my 13 fabulous friends as they walked down the aisle.

This is Casey. She is actually my niece and was my Junior Bridesmaid. Her father, John is Dan's older brother. Casey was a trooper, hanging out with all of us crazy girls. She is now the mother of a beautiful 9 month old named Myra Marie. My great niece. 

Ashley and I did our internships together for Child Life. She came about in a time of my life where I was really transitioning. We had many good times together during our internship and stayed friends afterwards. She is now married to Dan's best friend Bill. Way back at the beginning of my relationship with Dan, before we had even recognized it as a "relationship" (the first time around)-he invited me to come to North Carolina to visit him. Ashley was in town to visit and she didnt even blink an eye when I said that I had to leave and come to see Dan. She even loaned me some cute clothes to wear while I was there. I've never forgotten that. Ashley is the step-mother to Porter and is mom to Ryan-Parker and a new baby boy, coming in December. 

Megan and I have been friends forever. Or at least it seems that way. We declared ourselves BFF's in the 7th grade and even had a notebook of letters that we passed back and forth between classes. Megan is one of the most stable friends in the world. She and her husband Alem are 2 of the greatest people ever. She always takes the time to respond to things I send her and makes time for me anytime I am in Texas and near her. She and Alem came to see me in Galveston when mom was sick and I will never forget them taking me to dinner. It was one of the most "normal" moments I had during that difficult time.  There is something about having friends that have known you almost your entire life. That doesnt happen every day! Megan has 4 beautiful children: Ryan, Caden, Kellyn and Evan. 

I really met Jennifer in 2nd grade. I always joke with her about remembering that day. We were at a birthday party for a mutual friend and I thought she was so "prissy" because she threw a fit when she spilled hot fudge on her rabbit coat. Little did I know....Years later, in Junior High we became great friends and after I moved to Houston, she and Megan were 2 of the only friends who kept in touch with me on a regular basis. Her house in Breckenridge (and her parents) was always my second home. There are not many childhood places that still feel like home to me, but her house is. It's where I got ready for 2 proms, flooded the bathroom, painted t-shirts and drank her mother's awesome sweet tea. Jenny and her husband Matt currently are living in Germany and have 2 kids, Isabelle and Aaron.  

When Dan and I broke up the first time, I lived in a hotel for several weeks. I was introduced to Wendy through a mutal friend and she and 2 other girls took me into their house. This began a whole new era in my life. Wendy is my rock.  She is my voice of sanity when I feel like I am losing it.  When Hollister was born, she took me to lunch almost every week-so I wouldnt feel like I was losing my girlfriends just because I had a baby. Watching her grow and change over the past 8 years has been amazing. Seeing how God has worked in her life has been just awesome. She is Hollister's godmother and I can't imagine life without her. She just got married this summer and she and Jason are living in Jonesboro, Arkansas. I miss her every day. 

Michelle was really my first friend in North Carolina. At the time, she was married to Dan's best friend Bill and they graciously let him live with them. Later on, Michelle and I  had so many fun times as single ladies. She helped me with camp for several years and one of my favorite memories of her is the memory of the 2 of us line dancing in Calgary at a camp conference. We thought we were so funny. Michelle has always taken care of me. I remember one time when a patient of mine died. I was devastated and exhausted after spending hours with him. I walked in her house and laid on her couch. All I remember is her covering me up with a blanket.  Michelle and her husband Drew live here in Charlotte. She is Porter's mom and also has a darling 2 year old named Cameron. 

If there is anyone that shares my faith, it's Cat. We are always on the same wave length. We always seem to know when we are thinking of one another. Cat is the most like me. Yet it's amazing to me that we became friends. We've never lived in the same city. We actually became friends on one of my visits to Shreveport. She had just gone through a devastating break up-with Dan! I spent hours trying to explain to her how he was just awful in relationships. Ha! Cat and her husband David live in Shreveport with a miraculous little boy named Camden who was born at 24 weeks, and a little girl named Mia who should be here in about 20 weeks. (Because she is NOT coming early!)

Alicia and I met through our boyfriends-back in my Shreveport days. We just hit it off from day one, and spent our first few months as friends making the trek 3 hours away to watch the boys play professional soccer. Oh, we had so much fun!! We made last minute road trips in the middle of the night, ran out of gas, and gradually developed a friendship that was much stronger than the relationships we were in. Isn't that the beauty of girlfriends. I will always be grateful to Alicia for keeping my cat Joey for me when I moved to Charlotte (Dan was allergic). She knew how much I adored that cat and didnt want to give him away to just anyone. She kept him safe until I moved in with Wendy (who let me bring him with me!). 

Alicia and her husband Robbie also live in Sheveport and they have 2 super cute kids named Raylie and Rhyson. 

Annzie also saved me. Are you seeing a pattern? I had bought a new townhouse and it wasnt ready yet. The roommates I had at the time were NOT working out and I needed a place to live-FAST. Annzie (whom I had been friends with for years) graciously offered Joey and I a place to live (even when he peed on her hardwood floors). We spent many a night on couches across from each other, discussing life, watching TV and drinking wine.  She was the first person I told when Dan and I started talking about marriage. She had to live with me during all of the planning. We still love to meet up on random nights and try to solve the problems of the world, one glass of wine at at time. Annzie lives here in Charlotte with her husband Blaine.

Jolie was my first friend in college. We were on the gymnastics team together and 90% of all of my college memories include her.  Those were the days. Somehow we survived that first semester and both walked away with GPA's under 2.0. Not sure we were great influences on each other. College would not have been the same without her.  After college, we were roommates and had several wonderful years exploring the "real" world together. After Hollister was born, she knew I would be a bit lost without my mom, so she flew out here to help me. I loved having her here. As the mom of 2 boys at the time, she was an expert and she made a difficult transition time so much easier. She and her husband David live in Prairieville, Louisiana and they have 3 boys now. Gabriel, Joshua and Jacob. 

Kristen and I also became friends through our college boyfriends.( Actually, she had the same one that Alicia had a few years later.)  

Our true friendship was born when she tricked me into running 2 miles with her one day. Kristen is my reality check. She doesn't let me get away with anything and she tells it like it is. College would not have been complete without her. We are complete opposites and yet she is often the first person I still call when I am in crisis. I adore her children and love them almost as much as I love her. She shared them with me during a time when I wasnt sure I would ever get married and have my own. Kristen is also one of the only people who really thinks I am funny.  We spend most of our conversations on the phone laughing and I love that. Kristen and her husband Brian live in Mobile, Alabama and besides Graysen and Campbell, they also have two todders-Sara Douglas and Curtis. 

Jennifer is my soul mate. Can your soul mate be a girl? Definitely! She was the first friend I made in Charlotte that was not through Dan. We worked at the hospital together. She is an incredible oncology nurse.  Jen is the only person who has ever understood just how much I love my patients, because she loves them the same way.  I found out I was pregnant with Hollister on the day she had her first son John. She is my "mommy" friend. The one that I call when I am stressing about Hollister's tantrums or when he says something so funny that no one else would undestand. She has walked the infertility journey with me, day by day, and knows how I feel because she walked it herself.  If every day did not include Jennifer in it-I would be lost. Jen is married to Brian and they have 2 sons, John and Miles. 

Traci was my maid of honor. She was phenomenal. (more on that in later posts). But the long and short of it is that she dedicated several years to many different important events in my life. My 30th birthday, my wedding, my mom's illness and memorial service.  She is such a beautiful soul who cares so much for the people around her. It's really amazing. She has the ability to make anything you are going through seem like the most important thing at the moment. Of all my friends, Dan is closest to Traci. They were actually friends first. She was my first "going out" friend in Charlotte. She made me feel welome in a brand new city, driving me to new places and helping to make sure I didnt get lost (which I did daily). She is Hollister's other godmother. He is lucky enough to have 2. Traci just started a very exciting career as a personal trainer here in Charlotte. 

The wonderful crowd watching the girls and I walk down the aisle. 

My dad and I.  Just after all the girls made it down. 

Megan and I-9th grade

Jennifer and I-Junior Year

One of my wedding showers

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This was when Alicia brought Joey home to me. 

This was the day I left for Charlotte-the day Dan and I started dating. That's the cute black dress that Ashley loaned me. 

Kristen and I. One of her visits to Charlotte to see me. 

My Jennifer

An all-time favorite. Traci and I in Cancun. 

Wendy and I back in our roomate days. 

Amy, Megan and Jennifer

Dan, Jolie and I at the Grand Canyon

My bachelorette party in Charleston.

I loved that my girls went to Camp CARE with me one year. 

This is very characteristic of Cat, Alicia and I. 

My brother with all the girls-a few nights before the wedding. Typical. 

Probably one of my favorite nights ever. 

Same night. 

Morning of the wedding.

Wine Party in Charlotte

Hanging out with Annzie in Charleston

With Kristen (and Campbell) at her wedding. 

Bridesmaids luncheon. 

The night everyone started coming in town for the wedding. 

I just had to put this in there. This is very typical of Cat and I. We love to dance together. 

Casey and sweet Myra

When the girls came to help me take care of mom.

Just so the boys don't feel left out. I'm not writing a whole post about them. 

I was surrounded by so much Love. Aren't they fabulous?

I love you all.